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There’s science behind Monday melancholy

Oh, the dreaded Monday: We all experience and endure it; although depending on your specific schedule, your Monday might fall on a Thursday. Still, we understand the concept of Monday melancholy (or Thursday melancholy, as the case may be).

I’ve never been one to shy away from Mondays. It’s as good a time as any to get things done and put things off. But I have to confess — lately, they’ve been getting to me. I find myself feeling listless and unmotivated on the first day of the standard workweek.

You know what they say, when life gives you lemons … In this case, when life gives you a Monday, I say make it a three-day weekend. Unfortunately, that’s not typically possible. Like it or not, we’ve all got to deal with Mondays upwards of 50 — or maybe even more — times every year.

Science backs me up on this: Monday is unavoidable. Research has proven that each morning when you wake up, there is a 14.2857 percent chance the day will be a Monday. You can’t argue with numbers because numbers don’t lie — and not just because they can’t talk.

I, for one, am not going to give 14.2857 percent of my days over to melancholy. There are good things about Monday. Sure there are. You just have to click your heels together and believe.

Monday marks the beginning of the workweek. Opportunities for accomplishing tasks and attaining goals spread out in the days ahead, waiting to be conquered. Monday is filled with possibilities.

Going to work on Monday gives you a nice break from weekend chores like scrubbing toilets or cleaning out the garage.

A Monday morning commute gives you a break from life, but not traffic. It can be a time to reflect on the past and plan for the future, but not send or receive text messages. You can rock out and sing loudly to the radio on your choice of station without your kids or spouse changing it on you, which can be irritating, even on a Saturday.

As you are making your commute, remember to smile. It’s Monday! If you do, you’ll be ahead of the majority. According to Internet lore, most people do not smile on Monday until 11:16 a.m. and that’s probably because by that time they are anticipating lunch.

Monday is a good day to put things off until tomorrow. You’ve got lots more time to complete the project with a Friday deadline, which seems a long way off on Monday. Procrastination and Mondays go together like wine and cheese.

While procrastinating on a Monday, you can take the chance to catch up on all the social media activity you missed over the weekend — during your breaks and lunch, of course. You can view photos of all the exciting things your friends did while you were home cleaning the garage.

Monday rhymes with fun-day, which is a great time to test the pairing of wine and cheese alluded to earlier — after work, of course.

Sometimes the sun is shining on Monday. In fact, according to highly accurate Internet statistics, it is the least rainy day of week. That makes it a Monday sun-day, which beats out rainy days and Mondays any day of the week.

Finally, Monday’s a great day to count your blessings. When you do, I’m pretty sure you’ll decide Monday’s not so bad after all. Besides, at the end of the day you’ve only got three more to go until Friday.

Jill Pertler is an award-winning syndicated columnist, published playwright, author and member of the National Society of Newspaper Columnists. Don’t miss a slice; follow the Slices of Life page on Facebook.

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