Lance and Billy’s take on local sports

Talk about it

The following is another “Have Fun or Get Out of the Way” column by Don Leighton and Mike Granlund and their alter egos, Lance Boyle and Billy Pirkola, which runs occasionally in The Superior Telegram.

Get you thinking caps on because we are only a few weeks away from announcing our big contest. Instructions will be coming your way soon on how to participate and win great prizes.

Dinner with Lance and Billy is a great prize, isn’t it? Just think of all the fun you will have, trying to figure out what makes us tick. Our psychiatrists have spent years with no concrete opinions.

Start keeping track of things and people we miss. The rules and all pertinent information will be forthcoming in a future column.

Keep reading!

Quotes

Since the World Series is just around the corner, we have found some great quotes about our national pastime.

“It’s hard to win a pennant, but it is harder losing one.” Chuck Tanner, former Pirate manager.

“When we played, World Series checks meant something. Now all they do is screw up your taxes.” Don Drysdale, former Dodger pitching great.

“If the World Series runs until Election Day, the networks would run the first one-half inning and project the winner.” Former Met announcer, Lindsey Nelson.

“Good pitching will beat good hitting any time, and vice versa.” Former Pirate pitcher, Bob Veale.

“Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?” Former Yankee pitcher, Jim Bouton.

“I’ve come to the conclusion in life that the two most important things are good friends and a good bullpen.” Former manager, Bob Lemon.

“It ain’t like football. You can’t make up no trick plays.” Yogi Berra, everybody knows Yogi.

“Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona.” George Will, Men at Work: The Craft of Baseball, 1990.

“Most games are lost, not won.” Casey Stengel.

‘Mr. Baseball’

Here are some great quotes from Bob Uecker, Mr. Baseball, announcer for the Milwaukee Brewers.

“I had slumps that lasted into the winter.”

“I knew when my career was over. In 1965 my baseball card came out with no picture on it.”

“In 1962, I was named minor league player of the year. It was my second season in the bigs.”

“One time I got pulled over at 4 a.m. I was fined $75 for intoxication and $400 for being with the Phillies.”

“People don’t know this, but I helped the Cardinals win the pennant. I came down with hepatitis. The trainer injected me with it.”

“When I looked at the third base coach for the sign, he turned his back on me.”

“The highlight of my career? In 1967 with St. Louis, I walked with the bases loaded driving in the winning run in an inter-squad game in spring training.”

“When I came up to bat with three men on and two outs in the ninth, I looked in the other team’s dugout and they were already in street clothes.”

“The way to catch a knuckle ball is to wait for it to stop rolling and then pick it up.”

Maybe the best quote of all time is attributed to the one and only Yogi Berra. What a great player he was for the Yankees.

He is still the best known “butcher” of the English language, and everybody loves Yogi. He once said about a particular restaurant, “I don’t want to go there. Nobody goes there anymore, it’s too busy.”

Well, that’s about it from the press box of life. Enjoy the World Series, especially those great day games. Oh, I forgot, there are no day baseball games anymore. The last day World Series baseball game played outside was in 1984 between the Padres and the Tigers, unless you want to count game six of the 1987 St. Louis-Minnesota series.

Lance doesn’t count that one since the Cardinals lost.

Things we’re anxious to see

The WIAA district football proposal will likely be voted on this winter. It may go into effect as early as next season. Teams would be placed into “districts” based on enrollments. Rice Lake and Menomonie would disappear from the Spartans schedule. Northwestern would lose Hayward, Chetek and Ladysmith. One non-conference game would be scheduled.

The WIAA also is working on a plan for a five-class state basketball tournament. Sources tell us it could be effective this March, but that seems too early to us.

Northwestern basketball star Steve Tecker has not decided on a college to continue his playing career and get an education. Four D-I universities have made offers to the 6-foot-5 guard, but he remains patient. His AAU teammate, Dyami Starks, formerly of Superior, will play DI at Columbia University in New York City.

The Swain cross country meet will be held in Duluth Saturday. It’s one of the biggest high school meets in the country. The most fun and the best photo op of the year is the start of this race with all of the different school colors represented.

Unbeaten as of this writing (in HON), Northwestern will play volleyball at unbeaten (in HON) Hayward on Tuesday, and once again it will help determine the Heart O’ North Conference title. We are hoping Anna Morgan and the crew will prevail.

Their season is a ways off, but we have been noticing Roger Plachta’s UWS Yellowjacket softball team accumulating a lot of talent, and much of it is local. Kallie Kucharski, Taylor VanDamme, Ashley Martin, Ashlee Olson, Chelsey Jarzin, Amanda LeBard, Emily Eisenman, Britnee Blake and Lindsay Garay are familiar names on the local diamonds.

And of course the Packers and the Vikings play on Monday night. The question is: Who will not watching? This game has the buildup of a Super Bowl. As math geeks we know the 12 is greater than four.

Apple Festival, Windmill tour, Twin Cities Marathon, Superior Youth Football League, Oulu Corn Maze, golfing ... there is so much to do!

Opinions and/or story ideas can be e-mailed to dleigh1273@aol.com or wgranlund@centurytel.net

Tags: have fun or get out of the way, sports, superior, prep, collections